There comes a time in a young, soon-to-be-graduate blogger’s life where they feel the need to share the advice they wish they could give their freshman selves. Or the top 20 things they learned in college. Or the five things they don’t tell you about college. Or the 57 reasons not to blah blah blah in college. Personally, I do love those lists because they are true.
I am not about to make you read a list of all the things I have learned in the four craziest years of my life. I am just going to tell you one little piece of advice that I have learned to be true the hard way, over and over again, and still to this day need to remind myself of because it is that vital in my future deciding plans.
The best advice you will ever receive in your entire life will be from yourself.
Before you roll your eyes and expect me to start quoting “The Lion King,” (anyone else imagining Mufasa telling Simba to remember who he is and trusting that? No? No one?) hear me out. Think of the last time you gave advice to someone. Whether it be your best friend, a peer, a colleague, a mentee, a sibling, how did you suggest they respond to a decision? Well, if this person is close to you, you probably want them to just be happy, right? *Hopefully, you want everyone to be happy. Spread the love.* You want them to do what is best for their well-being and future. You might have even wanted them to recognize their self-worth or muster up some courage and take a risk. Maybe you told them to be honest or humble or suck up their pride to do the right thing. You might have told them to go chase their dream or stop caring about what people thought. Or maybe you told them that they need to make this decision for themselves.
I read something somewhere (yes, I have lost it) that sometimes people give the advice to others they themselves need to hear. At first I thought, no- that just doesn’t make sense. However, after a few conversations with my friends about the usual graduation and real life panic, I often heard them say, “Well, why don’t you follow your own advice and chill out?” or “Maybe you should also remember that for yourself.” (By the way, these were said in a very loving and kindhearted manner even though they sound very harsh when written out).
When we give advice, we try to put ourselves in the other person’s shoes and give them our best solution to the situation.
Dump her/him. Go travel the world. Stand up to them. Start your own company. Chase your dream. Buy a dog.
However, if we were really in that exact position, would we do it? “Well it’s different if I was in that situation,” you say. Would it be though? Would it be that different or would you just be afraid to take the good advice you told someone else because it was too bold or risky or hard?
If we want our loved ones to take our “good advice,” don’t you think you should also? I mean you are one of your own loved ones. If you don’t think that’s true, well take my advice, and start doing something about that.
“Be the change you wish to see in the world,” and TAKE YOUR OWN DAMN ADVICE. It goes along with the whole “live by example” thing we all pretend we don’t remember learning from kindergarten.
Don’t worry. You got this.