Here’s Your “Two Cents” Back.

Being in college means two things: everyone thinks they know more than you, and you’re tired of people telling you that they know more than you. Most adults will give you advice such as “These are the best years of your life, so don’t waste them!” and most friends will tell you “You should really start dating around more…all the good guys are almost gone!”

Well, as much as I appreciate the advice and expert knowledge on the matter, aka my life, I’m pretty sure I will be 100% okay without everyone’s $0.02. Besides, I’m not that desperate for money. If you are going to give me your $5, then we can talk.

Here are some of the things you shouldn’t say to me or anyone else going through this stage in their lives.

“You should really think about your future.” Oh, really? You know up until this very moment when you told me to do so, I had not even thought about my future at all. That’s definitely not why I am in college, or trying to apply to internships, or making my five and ten year plans. Thank you so much for reminding me.

“Can you really see yourself marrying him?” Well one, sometimes people date to have fun and not think about what kind of wedding cake they are going to have at the reception. And two, maybe I don’t know at the moment. OR MAYBE it isn’t any of your business because I am actually dating 17 guys at once and you don’t know about any of the other ones.

“There really isn’t a lot of money in (insert dream job, dream position, dream company here)” I guess I’m just going to live on the streets then. It really is all about the money anyways, right? Who would ever want to take a job because they love it? Also, this isn’t news.

“Are you ever going to…” I don’t care how you end this sentence. Whatever you say here is going to sound condescending and rude and make me feel 100% worthless in my goals and where I am at this point in my life. So please, just don’t ask.

“You should probably cut down on the wine.” NEVER, under in circumstance tell someone in college to do this. EVER. Unless you want less limbs walking away from the conversation.

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